The Power of Control and Values

Wednesday, May 06, 2026

PLAN TO LIVE/Healthy Living/The Power of Control and Values

In this third part of our "The Planned Life" series, we move away from planning for external events and look inward. This article is about managing your mental energy and using your personal values to make choices that feel right, even when the world feels chaotic.

The Planned Life
​Finding Your Focus:
The Power of Control and Values

Have you ever spent hours worrying about something you couldn't change? Maybe it was a rumor at school, the rainy weather on the day of a big event, or the way the economy is moving. It is exhausting, isn't it? When we focus on things we can't control, we feel powerless.

The "Circles of Influence":
Where to Put Your Energy

A great way to fix this is to divide your world into two circles. 

The first is your Circle of Concern. This includes all the things you worry about but have no power over, like your boss’s mood swings or global inflation. The second is your Circle of Influence. This includes the things you can affect, such as how much you save, your work ethic, and how you choose to react to others.

The secret to peace of mind is to spend your energy only in your Circle of Influence. The more you focus here, the bigger your influence grows, and the less power your worries have over you. It is like learning to steer your own boat instead of just crying about the size of the waves.

Self Reflect

  • What is one thing you’ve been consistently worrying about lately that falls entirely outside your "Circle of Influence"? How much energy does that worry consume?
  • Now, identify one small action you can take within your "Circle of Influence" to reduce that stress. What would it feel like to take that action?

Your Inner Compass:
The Values-Based Decision Matrix

When life gets messy, it’s easy to make fast decisions based on fear or what other people think. To stay on track, you need an internal compass: your core values. These are the things that truly matter to you, like freedom, connection, or security.

Once you know your values, you use them as a filter for every big choice.

  • In Your Finances: If you value security over "quick thrills," you’ll avoid risky investments.
  • In Your Relationships: If you value respect, you will choose to speak calmly even when you are angry.
  • In Your Career: If you value passion, you might turn down a high-paying job that goes against your ethics.

Self Reflect

  • Take a moment to name three core values that are most important to you (for example: freedom, growth, or honesty).
  • Think about a recent decision you made. Did it truly align with these values, or was it driven by pressure from others? What might you have chosen differently if you had let your values guide you?

By focusing on what you can control and sticking to your values, you shift from a state of anxiety to a life of active, empowered living. You become the confident captain of your ship, ready for any weather.

In the final part of our series, we will focus on how to actually get moving when a goal feels too big to handle. We will also look at the "big picture" to make sure the steps you are taking today are the ones that will matter most in the future.

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Hi.
I'm Christopher


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